Perfect Postcard

We had beautiful last day on Kaprije, a bit fresher after the rain with clear air and high visibility. We climbed to the Kaprije summit and enjoyed the sight of Zirje and Kornati and smaller isles nearby.

Stoping to smell the succulents

We're still on Kaprije swimming and sunbathing and eating well. I'm not usually big on vacations and I usually cannot stand not working on something palpable. This time I have managed to have my cake and eat it too; I rest and relax and have fun and also have fun coordinating some work-related issues from here. I love the feeling that this year I won't find myself buried under a mountain of backlog when I return to work.

Kaprije

It is my first visit to Kaprije, island in Sibenik sea territory. It is about an hour long trip by fast boat from Sibenik and the island itself is quite quaint and lovely. What I love the most is that I have great conversation partner, vigil and interested in keeping coversations fact-packed and focused and in the same time ladden with impressions and emotion circumstance interpretations.

Afternoon in Sibenik

So, we're off to our vacation, my offspringess and I, and today we're exploring Sibenik. We started off way too early and have arrived hours before our ferry so we decided to spend our afternoon wandering trough Sibenik Sunday streets. Crickets are chirping in the high sun and air is saturated with smell of the sea and pine resin. I wonder how I ever lived so strung out and flooded with emotions of every experience so I could not form memories. Being calmer surely offers great value for how I spend my time.

How do we deal with office conflict?

Mostly not very well. But there is hope. I love my job dearly. Searching for it I was steering myself by Confucius's saying:"Choose a job you love, and you will never have to work a day in your life" and it, pretty much, worked. I love the challenge, intellectual requirement, hype and pressure. I love how I can fully utilize my work ethics in it and how it pays off. And of course there are people working with me who do not share my enthusiasm and who involve themselves in futile misplacement of their energy. But actual problems are never ideological in nature. Ideology merely reflects in down-to-earth situations and my opinion is that they should be regarded as such since it saves a lot of grief. The problem should never be stated as "you're a lazy-ass bastard" but "This task, that I was expecting to have been done, was not done. Negotiating new guidelines is needed." This week it worked like a charm. I'm pleased, very very pleased.

R&R Weekend

Fun and relaxing weekend is slowly drifting away to the past. Yesterday evening we had some rain and it smelled like approaching autumn. I'm not really ready for autumn yet, with my considerable summer footware collection hardly worn outside of my workplace. I wonder if this is how I will feel confronted with imminent death - pondering on amounts of unworn feelings and thoughts.

Serendipity

What do you see in photo above? Here is how the story goes; there was me, trying to mind my own business and there was my life, being complicated and wreaking havoc, as usual. So I got to the office and logged in to my gmail inbox and went on to find something motivational to assign to my status bar and I found Louis Pasteur's quote "Chance favors the prepared mind." and I put it in my status bar and went on with my daily business. Later on I had an sms altercation with my estranged spouse, later still I discussed feminine beauty with a friend and couldn't, for the life of me, remember name of an actress I wanted to use as an example of a perfect 10. Since I could not sleep not having remembered the name I searched for it by using the only movie name that I could remember featuring her - Serendipity. When I hit "search" there were few Wikipedia results one after another and in my haste I opened the one showing not facts about 2001. romantic comedy but description of the term "serendipity" in which, few lines down in the text, there is Mr. Louis Pasteur and his famous saying:"In the fields of observation chance favors only the prepared mind." In the photo above there is my finger seconds after it was dipped in face cream while I was preparing for bed few days ago. I suppose we're all well enough prepared for this kind of discovery. Recently I started to hope my mind is prepared for more audacious discoveries. Discoveries like finding a way to assert some order and composure into emotionally tensed arrangements.

Desire

I've been a bit more at ease lately. Trying to teach myself to "stay in the moment" as Alan Watts would say through Charlie Crews's mouth. Also, I have just watched House MD S02E13 "Skin Deep" re-run. It is truly a work of art. Re-conceptualization. If there ever was a book I feel everyone having half a brain should read it is surely Joey Comeau's Lockpick Pornography. There is something utterly irresistible in acquiring a meme as beautiful as some of his mind children. Listening to Ryan Adams sing Desire as House end credits rolled over the screen I thought of my desire; odorless and transparent, mimicric and predatory - always eager to hunt down and submit yet so often unsatiated.

Exuse me, sir... Where are we now?

It has been excruciating few days. No sleep, or food, nor perk nor pleasure could distract me from the notion that seemingly nothing can be done about a problem I have. All that CAN be done is to wait and see what the future will bring - and I really hate the helplessness it implies, inefficiency it imputes to me. Walking into office this morning I was overwhelmed with a sense of closure and serenity and my thoughts tingled with a poem I read years ago, poem "Grass" by Carl Sandburg.

I was done searching for a solution already. Now I am also done waiting for a solution. I will let IT come to ME.