Monday, October 19, 2015

Usual Fare

Distress is like a location beacon for all other misery searching for company. As soon as experience manages to crack you open, showing your unprotected innards, people flock to have themselves a piece.

While I was in marital distress there was a constant stream of offerings of sex, by no less distressed individuals, because; what could be better to soothe and tide over this existential quandary before it settles into acceptance of "that's what life is" and "they're all the same". 

It did not fare well for them. Willingness to part with unacceptable conditions even at the price of breaking the mold of my own behaviors that facilitated the issue scared and threathened them and they would react with hatred and agression - yet it was as impotent as all their previous efforts.

During the divorce I was frequently told how brave I am and I did not understand it at a time. It did not seem to me that bravery is taking a stand to protect my child and myself from the life that I found demeaning and detrimental. Surely - that is the norm, anyone would do it, everyone does is - I thought.

But no. It is not and they do not. Social pressure even makes sure that the entropy of the system is increased. 

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